all it took was a great balance of things. one evening of fantastic conversation with the sexy ladies of yaknupones (yaku-nuvo-capones) add in a few men to the punch, as well as some weng-weng concoctions, and you got a friday night of insane smiles. then just to balance it off...enjoy the quiet saturday, in between phone calls of more sober support sessions and an even more laid back evening with pizza, my brother and scrubs. perfect weekend. Topped off with some shopping Sunday and caught the last showing of Pirates. (sorry chris...lemme look for my cam for the pics!)
So today, Monday...got a lot of work to do and had a lot of ruffled feathers but all in all, its a good balance. that's what we look for and want. all in extreme moderation. like platonic intimacy? hehe, my brother and i invented that term.
and lastly, the weather has been cooperating. the drizzles keep me giddy. the cold is refreshing and leaves me happy with my choices. tomorrow's another day where anything can happen. and it keeps getting better.
Where do we go who knows But each day gets better I just can't let her go Each kiss gets sweeter I just can leave her no
I'll write a song I thought about it for far to long But I Never had someone to sing about Until I meet her and each days get better Nobody knows, nobody sees Nobody else understands me like she Now there I Know what true love means I Just hope she stays with me
She Wants to breathe She wants to be where the grass is green She wants to know how love supposed to be She wants it better I want just let her know She belongs right here with me She's all that I make her see I make her fall Make her believe I promised her that I never leave
I Just had to write a song about her Tell her I don't wanna leave without her Tell her that I would build my world around her Deeper and deeper Sweeter and sweeter I'll never leave her alone
I just finished the last episode of Season 6 of Scrubs!!!! Sorry, this is a warning - i am a HUGE zach braff fan. I wish i was elliot and the minute he stares at you and says "hey"...i'm all yours. sigh. what a cliff hanger. I don't know if its the show or him but i like how guys look in scrubs...yummey.
this weather is also getting me in a wired mood. even if i felt the pangs of a slight fever this morning, as soon as it started to rain and there's this cold wind, i felt all romantic and giddy. Like there's something good coming.
And just when you think the opposite, all your old buds show up. trina had her cam fixed so got to see her at the customer care center and catch up. had a lengthy conversation with debbie and anna. got the support of my new partner in whine, had drinks with frances and raf, even N all the way in new york gave me some moral words of wisdom to help me through, have a coffee date with claud and joy this weekend and the hugs from my bro. sometimes it's not just advice or comfort when you're down. it's just about sharing your life and listening to each other. something i haven't felt in a while. to listen with interest and be listened to with light laughter. and not the kind when you make fun of other people... as someone told me - better to surround yourself with nice people, not those who get laughs at the expense of others. good influences.
the winds tell me something great is going to happen...
Just a small town girl, livin' in a lonely world She took the midnight train goin' anywhere Just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit He took the midnight train goin' anywhere A singer in a smokey room A smell of wine and cheap perfume For a smile they can share the night It goes on and on and on and on Strangers waiting, up and down the boulevard Their shadows searching in the night Streetlights people, living just to find emotion Hiding, somewhere in the night Working hard to get my fill, everybody wants a thrill Payin' anything to roll the dice, just one more time Some will win, some will lose Some were born to sing the blues Oh, the movie never ends It goes on and on and on and on Don't stop believin' Hold on to the feelin' Streetlight people Don't Stop Believin' by Journey
congratulations cristina for landing a new job! and i do think it's perfect for you. you will get your heart's desire of travelling and talking about it. hope you'll be as content as i am that you've found something worthwhile on a daily basis.
got to watch two movies recently - The Holiday and Shrek 3. As diverse as the polar icecaps and the equator, they both served their purpose though. Caught holiday just right before heading off to mom's art exhibit at Serendra (look for pretty birds of paradise at the 2nd floor!) where i started my saturday off with hobnobbing for several hours. my jaws and drums pretty exhausted from all the conversation revolving around my current work. It came out a productive party though. think i had at least three new working relationships for the future. that's when i realized i was almost late for my next stop so said my goodbyes and rushed off to greenbelt to meet some buddies. it was great catching up on news with some simple, funny, break-it-to-me-straight friends. of course me being the only girl and not a good looking man in sight (aside from them), i just helped with the hottie watching. but heat can really get to you so skipideedoodah back to...where else would you think? here we got to see the newly married couple fresh from their honeymoon (see previous post) and all giddy with their newfound state. its nice to see a couple like that...which made us all just drink even more. growing in number we just started knocking as much as possible down till (some off us) couldn't feel anything anymore. literally. last two standing at 4am. time to go home. time to shut the phone to really just block off everything.
The Holiday still rings in my head though. you KNOW it just doesn't happen that way. you meet someone who looks like jude law and he's the sensitive single father who just doesn't get a break that's why he plays around? hilarious. like anyone's really even single anymore. we're just remnants of other people veiled beneath your own dissent. You just find common ground. Fellow forlorn folks who can relate. Or kate winslet’s character, was she really ready to jump in something fresh, ready and able without susceptibility? The only believable scene was when the ex-gf calls and then: see jumping jack race off. Or the first man who makes you cry, is that the sign you’ve been looking for all your life? It’s the sign to run! Well, for me anyway. Like now.
Ok, it’s just a movie. A long forgotten one so will let it go. Will just lend it to someone who needs to find hope again. To know that your life does not end with this other person caring for you.
I’m not even going to tell you to watch Shrek 3. You know what to expect. Yeah it makes you want to get your own ogre who you can depend on to defend you against a prince charming. Imagine what hopes you’ll get from that. But last night, over drinks and discussions over dr. quack-quack in Mati there were three revelations: I like the sungit boy who reserves the secret sweetness just for me. Not the other way around. You will always enjoy meeting new people because they’ve never heard your stories before or will at least find new facts about yourself interesting, and there are five languages of love. As my friend told me – like a breath of fresh air.
i find it hard to write now. too many secrets. too much temptation. too many possible regrets. at least i got the giddy giggles again. even just briefly.
Goodness knows I saw it coming Or at least I'll claim I did But in truth I'm lost for words
What have I done it's too late for that What have I become truth is nothing yet A simple mistake starts the hardest time I promise I'll do anything you ask...this time
I miss getting flowers. After shopping for three arrangements over Mother's Day...I want my own! I actually got a dozen white roses from a supplier. I suppose they thought I was a mother already. sucks.
While I was selecting the perfect spring bouquet for tita, i realized that i always wanted a big buncha carnations. all colors. they're so pretty! forget the roses, i'm sick of the african daisies and gerberas...i just want carnations. Reminds me of the old Mom and Pop in BF (which is now Pancake House)where they had pails of them. And they're so affordable! Men never listen when i actually tell them what i want. sigh.
I wonder why people seem to think they know who I am, should be or what will make me happy? tsk tsk. I already know what will make me happy. It's just taking some time to get it done. Can't rush things right? I know what I need to do. It's just taken me this long to find out. and a little more time to set it up :)
if only things were this funny in real life...i want zach braff to hug me.
Small things. Even if you don’t know what your whole life’s destiny is, what you’re meant to do, you can still do small things. The ones that make you happy. Put them all together and you have one big accomplishment – you’ve lived through AND enjoyed another day. You can be proud of this.
Some people were destined for greatness, sure. They get to change the world. But just because you don’t, doesn’t mean you are insignificant. You can change yourself. You can help others. You can still do a lot that has meaning. Even if just to you.
I enjoy figuring something out for the first time. I relished the discovery of finding one bottle of Belgian beer than I forgot I had in my fridge. I look at all my stuffed toys drying up in the sun and changed my mind about giving them all away. I woke up late today and enjoyed the hold of my pillow. I voted today. I spoke to an old friend last night – and still felt like we never had any distance. I looked through my tiny notebook of to-do’s and checked them all yesterday. Formatted my pc last Friday and configured everything from scratch. Still don’t have the guts to look through some mementos but I already bought the safebox for them. Have one pile of magazines to send to the recycling center already. About 5 more piles to go. Looking forward to the comics on Fully Booked’s shelves. See picture below. They have yet to unpack.
Bought Spiderman Reign and savored the pages with a pouch of potato chips. Got my mom and lola flowers yesterday. Got a thank you message from my tita for her pot of spring flowers. Found some new Pillsbury recipes for my cookbook.
Saved and still saving enough money for a new view. Uploaded pictures of the wedding on multiply.
Made my decision to wait. But not to wait without progress. There’s always time and healing.
i want yellow shoesies! perfect for summer and after buying those teal blue shoes recently, i'm going for more color and pop.
look at me...i can't get any sleep so i'm shopping online. what a doof! should start packing for the summer outing - white shorts and slippers. that's it.
I coulda told you this myself without the need to answer those questions. It's my favorite color! well that and Red. I like 'em both. But purple has been my fave since high school...if ever you've even seen my debut gown! Elvira is the name!
Ever feel like you wanted to do something but your mind is telling you no? but you really really really want to? sigh. but before you think it's something kinky...this thought is more about lack of time. You have responsibilities - to your work, to your family, to your friends and the one most ignored, yourself.
My life is pretty full now. But in a good way. Work the whole day. Make time for dinners and coffee to catch up on others' lives. A few drinks on some fridays with those friends who only come out near midnight. like bats or night owls. weekends with the family on sunday. saturdays all to myself. I have nothing to complain about. Just being able to sit and read my books now are what I enjoy the most. I am STILL finishing Kafka on the Shore. It has taken me forever but you relish each page flip and each adventure that kafka undertakes since he's run away from home. the liberation he feels is a vicarious dish.
I am actually pretty excited about an upcoming project. There's a term i've come to think of for the past three years: GIVE BACK. In one conversation with Allan from Chicago, I asked him why he volunteered at the medical mission. I mean, he's a finance manager. When he was younger his dad, a doctor, had forced him to go. But now he goes at his own accord. Every single year. He travels here to visit the less fortunate and for an American, its pretty depressing to only get to see the medical cases. But he says its because he's been so happy and blessed - a good family, successful career and he just wants to give it back. Good values. So anyway, I'll be meeting with some doctors soon to discuss the Operation Smile project. It's actually part of my job now but I actually get to do something i've wanted personally. How great is that? It's the closest thing I'll get to the medical mission. Something I have yet to gather the nerve to do.
For the past...six years? Well, I was still in college - I wanted to volunteer at the Home for the Aged. A Christmas project I have yet to plan and implement. Sad to say, selfishness and responsibilities of my current life always play a hindrance. It's a heavy month of sales, shopping and family trips. I used to get caught up in exams which fell on december, now its highest sales expectancy so work keeps me too busy. The concept of "excuses" comes to mind but trust me, I've tried. Or maybe I tried to do it all myself. I need to ask for help.
Think this is also why I fell for a doctor. Someone who's life embodies what I've always wanted. Or the film maker who promoted the Mission and is a professional volunteer. Someone who shares the same desires and values.
With all the changes this year, who knows. This year it might be different.
i gotta put this on once in a while. i live with the music.
1. Makes me wonder - Maroon 5 2. Knocks me off my feet - Stevie Wonder 3. Sunday Morning - K-os 4. Could it be I'm falling in love - The Spinners 5. Don't stop believing - Journey 6. Wait a Minute - Pussycat Dolls 7. Promiscuous Girl - Nelly Furtado 8. Glamorous - Fergie 9. Everything is Alright - Motion City Soundtrack 10. Keep your hands off my girl - Good Charlotte
Yup, i am a confused song junkie. I have a mix of motown, pungent pop and squeeze some tempting alternative. But they're all happy tunes. yum.
oh and i like the new buzz cut on the boy. summer time!
Ah yes. James Brown knew what he was talking about. Today's quote says "You only live once."
I think i've already accomplished a lot. Of course, I still have this increasing level of expectancy but its been good nonetheless. Found out recently that some girls I know (friends and otherwise) have begun dating my old dates. And its good. Its an indication of how people change or sometimes you may have met them at the wrong time. or maybe, you just weren't right to begin with. now is the time to grow. no more incessant arguments and childish tantrums. it doesn't help me. and there's no room for those who purposely bring it to me. banish the emotional vampires!
Had dinner with Anna yesterday at Masas. I just can't get out of ordering sisig for dinner when its available. hehe. But I didn't finish it. Part of my diet. I got two weeks before an exciting day and i want to look extra good for that :) but we still had a large pitcher of gin pom. sorry to the rest who i couldn't meet up with afterwards. had a banging headache. must have been the gin or the pom.
this coming weekend is the summer outing and i have no clue what i'm going to do there besides sunbathing by the pool. I think there will be so many kids that I won't be able to relax anyway. the following tuesday is jay's wedding and i've completely given up on finding a dress. i'll just wear the nice ol' reliable orange chiffon, its perfect for the summer anyway. who cares if the guys have seen it before? even the bride remembers it from a wedding two years ago. and then there's the move. i'm trying to figure out what to bring to the new house. that's something to look forward to again. the whole fam is engaged in this effort to minimize the stuff we bring. its a good excuse to clean house. here's my list of throw outs: - old boyfriend memorabilia - old AIM cases - stuffed toys - clothes and i haven't worn in a year (except that orange dress) - old furniture (the extra bed, the sofa chair...stuff i just throw things on when i'm too tired to put them away) - old magazines (i'm bringing them to a recycling center) - compo and speakers (i hardly use it anyway with my ipod)
but i'm definitely bringing: - all my books! - current clothes - my bass - the dustbuster! - my favorite shoes (I got a new pair of charles & keith lace heels! sexay!) - bookshelves (i have these wooden ones from when I was a kid. still reliable) - filing cabinet (with all the papers i'm throwing away, i'll have space again) - my magazine collection (mademoiselle from the 90s, InStyle, Real Simple)
now is the time to go back to Japan Home Store and get all the storage bins.
now if only someone would buy my old laptop. I want to get the ibook and i can't seem to unload this thing! as vince suggested, i should just install a dvd drive and sell it. that's all people look for nowadays...
and here's another question: what am i going to do with my cassette tape collection???they are kind of memorable because some of them I inherited from my godfather who passed away. some are from my parents in the 80's. classics man.
and lastly, my new color theme. i figure it will be a mix of blue, green, purple and yellow. very nautical. funny since my favorite color has been red for the past several years. i'll just wear the color then.
ok enough about house cleaning. i'm just going to relax today at home. it's a holiday, don't ya know? :)
This is my world. This is who I am. And I'm not gonna give up myself to make your life better. And you want me to change. I can't get used to
all you want me to be and I just can't pretend to be anyone else 'cause it's not really me. - Darius Rucker
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